A Good Wife

Let the wife make the husband glad to come home, and let him make her sorry to see him leave.
-- Martin Luther




This morning, just a few hours after giving my husband his good-bye hug, my phone rang.  His voice was on the other end, he just called to say he loved me.


I could have cried.  


That man makes me so happy!  Not because he's perfect, or I'm perfect, or we have a perfect marriage.  But because everyday, through every trial, every frustration, every disappointment for the last 13 years, we have chosen to love each other!  Because of that choice, the love grows deeper and stronger and sweeter.  He is the very best friend I have ever had.


Some women aren't happy unless their husbands put big diamonds on their hands, or buy them fancy houses or cars.  I see women who start arguments with their husbands over why they had to take the trash out, fix the leak, or paint the house themselves.  I hear stories of separations and divorces because couples "just don't love each other" anymore.


What is happening?  The devil thinks he is so clever, that's what.  He disguises himself and prowls around under the veils of pride, envy, greed and so many other ugly things.  We mustn't let him have our families!


I love the quote by Martin Luther.  I love it because it is the heart of what makes a marriage work - taking the focus off of ourselves!  


When we focus on ourselves and our own wants, needs and desires, we create a bitterness in our hearts because of what is not happening.  However, when we look away from ourselves, and we ask 'What can I do for my spouse today that would make him feel loved?' something changes.  We stop thinking about what we want, and we put ourselves to work trying to please the other.  Our thoughts are focused on what they like to eat, drink, or wear.  What would make them feel cozy and relaxed after a long day at work?  Do we need a softer blanket for them near the sofa?  A pair of slippers under the bed?  A warm pot of coffee brewing when they pull into the driveway?  Stop thinking about yourself and think about him!  I don't want your husband to hear:  The kids were cranky and fighting all day and I'm too tired to cook dinner.  The Dr. appointment ran late and we didn't have time to run the errands you asked me to.  What do you mean where are your socks?  Don't you know how to wash and fold?  (That one is for me, ladies, I'm soooo guilty - I HATE matching socks!)


Did you know that if you stop thinking about yourself, a miracle will happen?  (Well, some of you might consider it a miracle, others might already have hubbies who do this).


The miracle is, God will move your husband's heart to begin to think about you!  All of a sudden, whatever your heart desires will be given to you.  He might offer to load the dishwasher, or play with the kids while you soak in a bubble bath.  He might surprise you with flowers, or take you to dinner for no good reason.  He might start giving you unexpected hugs and kisses and telling you that you're the best wife ever. 


Or, he just might call you one day for no reason other than to say, "I love you".  


Only God knows what makes you feel loved and special.  And only God knows what makes your husband feel that way.  Say a prayer today.  Ask Him to guide you.  If you already have a beautiful marriage, this can only make it better.  If you have one that's struggling, get ready for some changes!


I read an amazing book several years ago that completely changed my view about my role as wife and mother.  Because of this woman (and by the grace of God), I finally came to see it as my purpose and ministry!  

If you aren't sure how to become the wife God created you to be, this book will help.  If you are already an amazing wife, but would like to know how to encourage others, Debi offers excellent, Bible-based suggestions.  You can purchase this incredible book through their website: http://shop.nogreaterjoy.org/created-to-be-his-help-meet-book


One of my favorite verses regarding my purpose is Titus 2:3-5  "Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled".  (emphasis mine)


I hope you have a wonderful day of homemaking, my friends!  Make that husband of yours glad to come home!  I have to go now, I hear the dryer.  It's time to match some socks.